Alright everyone I have to come clean about something – I always thought when friends and family members were about to turn 25 and said something along the lines of “I’m having a quarter life crisis” that they were full of sh*t. Seriously, I would laugh or tell them they were being ridiculous. Welp, let me tell ya – I was VERY wrong. This “quarter life crisis” business is no joke and I’m right in the middle of mine.
I tell myself over and over again my mom’s favorite “age is only a number” line and I do believe that. I also believe 25 is so young, heck 50 is young. It’s not about the fear of running out of time or anything like that (for me at least) because I can say whole heartedly that at 25 and even 50 you are young and have so much to learn and do and be; our whole lives are ahead of us.
In so many ways I’m excited to see what is next to come but there is just this feeling that 25 means we’re full fledged adults and that’s scary. What I mean by that is it’s unsettling for someone like me who is not a big fan of change, to think of all that is going to change in the next decade of my life. Sure a lot of it is all good things but it’s still nerve racking.
I think it was at the 2 week mark to my birthday that it really all started to hit. I was in SUCH a bad mood and couldn’t shake it (plus every damn planet decided to be in retrograde but I’ll leave all my astrology issues out of here for now). My anxiety and OCD were high and I knew something was up; everything made me want to curl in a ball and cry. I was doing everything to try and feel better – I meditated, sagged myself and my entire room (daily), would go on long runs, let myself have that cookie I wanted but none of it mattered because I was still not myself.
It took until I had a total meltdown one night that I finally had the realization and cried to my parents “I think I’m on the verge of a quarter life crisis”. I let out all my fears and tears and slowly started accepting that this is something I don’t have control over, this is only a new age and there are ways to handle what feels like your life spiraling out of control.
I decided what I was going to do was make a list of 25 things I’m proud of for accomplishing before I turned 25. It really put’s everything into perspective and was a lot easier once I started than I thought it would be. Even the smallest things count and can make the biggest impacts on our life. I recommend taking some time and doing this yourself if you are feeling the same kind of stresses I have lately, but also in good times too. It’s important to take some time to look back and reflect on yourself and all that you are and all that you’ve done to help you reach all you plan to do.
XOX – your favorite almost 25 year old – Alysser Marie